Thursday, 10 March 2016

A Tribute to Opa



It has been a month since Opa died and though I’ve wanted to post something about him, I have not had the words.  Sure, I’ve been busy travelling and dealing with sick kiddos and jet lag but in truth, I have just felt far too overwhelmed to write about him. How can I capture in a blog post- in mere words- the impact this man has had on my life and so many others? My words feel far too inadequate to tell the story of this most remarkable man. My feelings bubble over, but words, right now, just don’t.

But the words spoken at his memorial service by his six sons- oh my, those words were not only adequate, but beautiful, powerful, truthful and inspiring and really a most amazing tribute to a most amazing man. I guess it wasn’t just the words, but the men behind them….. watching my Dad and his brothers stand up front together to share his eulogy was incredible. Here are some highlights of their words:

 As Dad so vividly narrated in his book, his position on the issue of non-violence began to take shape while he was still in his German army uniform.

It was in the act of writing Living With Conviction that Dad was able to process thoroughly his participation in the war, fighting for his fatherland, but certainly not for the political party in power.

And in the ashes of defeat,
Dad was able to find some answers.

They would come, gradually, as he rediscovered Anabaptist teachings of non-violence, which the German Mennonite church had largely abandoned.

So many of us here today have been significantly impacted and influenced by his journey and convictions.

He has given a younger generation fresh hope for a different way of dealing with conflict – and on a number of occasions provided a path to healing for those who were caught up in the same war – on which ever side it happened to be.

His campaign for peace was situated largely in his activities with Mennonite Central Committee, his most significant and visible contribution to public life and to the church.
               
While having strong convictions, Dad also had high regard for the positions of others–at times even changing his position in light of strong counter arguments. 

But no one will describe Dad as having been a shrinking violet.
Not known for being timid, his voice was a voice not easily ignored.
At least in decibel level, we have inherited that.
But all of us are still on the path to develop a similar voice of conviction,
voices for justice in this world around us,
for love and respect in our homes and families,
for a yearning, a hope, and a faith to be with our Creator, Redeemer, and Sustainer,
finally to hear the words:
Well done, my good and faithful servant.
May you rest in the LORD,
May you rest in peace.

And my Dad’s words during the sermon:

When I think of the trauma of having lived through the very first day to the very last day of the war- what he would have carried in terms of guilt, he was able to take to Jesus. And he found complete forgiveness. It’s that forgiveness that allowed God’s love to flow through him. I think if he hadn’t found that forgiveness, the flowing would have only been a trickle. He made a commitment that he would be a person of grace, joy and peace so that God’s healing and hope would flow through him to the world.

And also Uncle Martin’s part of the sermon:
I remember when he came back from one of his India trips. He talked about a small child who was under a piece of cardboard on the streets and he said, “Martin, that is one of my sons.” That is the Papi/Opa that we know.

He lived a life of striving for peace, for pursuing it, for reaching it and being hungry for it. And his demonstration of that was his incredible, enduring, unending commitment to the other, whoever the other was.

I didn’t know him as a proud or haughty father, but he pursued right living and challenged me not to do as he did, or even to live as he lived, but to pursue a life of following Jesus’ teaching. He once told me, “Martin, its simple and its hard, all at the same time. I have been called to love God and I have been called to love my neighbour and I can’t do that if I don’t live a life of peace. And that is your calling.”

And then my Dad ended his sermon with a quote from an interview of Opa where Opa said,
“In the end, Jesus will ask me, ‘did you feed me?’ I will be able to reply, ‘yes, I did.’”

It was so very hard to say goodbye to my dear Opa. I’m not sure I expected the goodbye to be so difficult, considering he was 101 and ready to die. But watching him descend into the earth as his loving sons stood there, tears bubbling over after they shoveled dirt on his rose-covered casket was almost more than I could handle.  I am extremely grateful I could fly home for his memorial service and cry with my Dad, my family, my cousins, uncles and aunts and say goodbye together.  It was a week that I deeply needed, for many reasons, and I am thankful.

I hope these words shared can continue to inspire us all to love others, stand up for injustice, forgive our enemies and trust in the reconciling Hope of Jesus, just like Opa’s life demonstrated. I will leave this post with another set of beautiful words written by one of my cousins and shared during the tribute. It speaks truth for so many of us who loved him and were impacted by him….

Opa, thank you for teaching me to forgive, to choose peace, and to see the good in all people. Thank you for teaching me about the importance of family. Thank you for passing these lessons to the generations that followed you. I'm not sure whether you always planned on it, but you have certainly left a legacy; it's one that our family is proud of and for which we are grateful.

I see you back with Oma, standing with your arm around her shoulder, just like the two of you would stand on the side of your mountain and wave goodbye as we'd leave your house in Agassiz, smiling, content, and full of love. Those happy images will be with me forever.



*if you would like to watch the whole service, or pieces of it, search on youtube "Siegfried Bartel memorial"

Saturday, 2 January 2016

Christmastime in Manila: Top 10

This is our fourth Christmas in the Philippines and for the first time ever, I think I spent more time reflecting on what I will miss about Christmas here than I did reflecting on what I miss about Christmas in Canada. As a family, we’ve known life in the Philippines more than life in BC and while I still feel homesick this season, it feels I’ve suddenly switched to being sad about the day when we’ll have to say goodbye to this city, these people and this life here. In some ways it has been a very difficult season for us- one where the familiarity of our home culture might have eased many struggles- but in other ways, Manila has never felt more like home than it does this year. In no particular order, here’s a little list of the highlights of our Christmas season:

1. Meeting Tita Sam’s baby, Yashari. What a sweet little teeny-weeny-cutie-pie bundle of joy I got to hold. Teyah was nearly twice as big at birth so she seems SO tiny! We are so happy for our dear helper, Sam, and her family and it was lovely to spend an afternoon in her home snuggling her little one.



2. Cody’s preschool Christmas concert. I was nearly in tears over the sweetness of hearing his little voice recite lines and sing songs and then watching his little dance moves had me in stitches. Filipinos know how to DANCE! and cutesy Christmas carol actions are not enough :) Perhaps you've seen him break it down in the video I posted on Facebook. 



3. Christmas Eve service at Union Church of Manila. It is dubbed the Candles and Chaos service, due to the abundance of joyful chaos coming from all the kiddos. So we fit in nicely! The best part was singing the hallelujah chorus (Makai’s all time favourite song since he first heard it 2 years ago) and at that totally silent moment right before the finale Cody sings a passionate HALLELUJAH causing a stream of laughter and stares around us!



4. Christmas baking. The best part of baking this year was an outing with friends to a local bakery where we made gingerbread houses (well, sugar cookie houses) and didn’t have to clean up a thing! While the debate raged on whether to eat the house immediately or keep it as décor, the ant issue was the deciding factor….. if there’s one thing I will never miss about the Philippines, it’s the abundance of ants in our house!



5. PeaceChurch Christmas gathering. Still a highlight, despite nearly everyone cancelling due to the typhoon that swept through the island that night. But Ate Reg and her beau, Mel, came and only Cody and I were in on the surprise :) We decorated Christmas cookies with them and sang Christmas songs- so special! Part 2 of the party happened a few days later where we repeated much of the evening with some of those who had been stuck at home due to the typhoon (sadly I forgot to take photos at either event).

6. Summer! I tend to really miss wool sweaters, cozy blankets and warm coats but when I hear that Vancouver has had endless rain, I do feel quite thankful for the scene below- Christmas Eve day and Cody is enjoying a little game of soccer under the palm trees with our neighbour.



7. Street games. I will miss the joy of watching the kids play with the children in Bryan’s community. They gather weekly to play games and listen to Bible stories…. their Christmas party was a blast!





8. Getting a Christmas Tree. We had a family outing to a local Garden Centre in search for the perfect house plant/Christmas tree. Our lovely little tree for the last three years was literally a foot tall, so while this may be no noble fir, we are quite pleased with our Filipino version :)



9. Casa Santa Christmas museum. Every single Christmas décor you could think of under one roof! Obviously the room full of Christmas stuffed animals was the hit for our family. When we’re missing out on family gatherings at home, finding fun things to do in Manila is essential!





10. New Years Getaway. For two nights over New Years we took the kids to a church camp- it was like Camp Squeah but with Palm trees. And SO much fun…. Pools, bowling alley, trampoline, bouldering wall, beach volleyball court (AKA awesome sand box), obstacle course, tree house, New Years party for the kids, good food and lots of new friends. The downside was the rain for 2 days straight (felt like Vancouver in June!) and the crazy amount of fireworks that put our kiddos in fearful tears. Poor Teyah woke up at midnight in such a fright- it was like Armageddon out there.







We hope your Christmas season was also filled with family, friends and much joy!

With love,
The Barkmans

Tuesday, 10 November 2015

friends, we cannot love the enemy and pull the trigger too.

As I watched the clock turn to 11am on November 11th here in the Philippines, I stopped my work and spent some time in prayer. On Remembrance Day, and everyday, I pray for peace in our world and I work for peace in our world.

This morning I'm preparing for a Peace and Reconciliation Training day that Peace Church is hosting on Saturday. I plan to have participants discuss their position on the statement, "The use of violence is justified in order to bring about peace." While opinions always vary, I choose to strongly disagree with this, which means I can never condone the use of military actions. Jesus Christ calls us to love our enemies, and in the words of my wise 100 year old grandfather, "Friends, we cannot love the enemy and pull the trigger too." I am thankful for my Opa and his legacy of building peace.



Click here to read a Remembrance Day article I wrote for The Light Magazine this month, about our experience working in a war-zone.

And click here to hear my grandfather's message of peace.